Angelo Cataldi

If Angelo Cataldi speaks for you as a fan, than I weep for you

If you haven’t heard it by now, Gabe Kapler’s impromptu interview this morning with Angelo Cataldi on the 94 WIP Morning Show was quite good. Angelo, despite his many, MANY detractions, knows what makes good radio and can conduct a hell of an interview.

Our friends over at Crossing Broad have the full audio if you haven’t heard it already.

Kapler and Cataldi go back and forth over a recent Cataldi column in “Philly Voice,” in which Cataldi criticizes the way GM Matt Klentak put together this year’s roster, going as far as to call Klentak “incompetent.”

Is he wrong? Maybe not, but the team was never viewed as contending this year and did outperform a Vegas win prediction several games. They did have a 14-win improvement over the abominable 2017 season and seem to be trending in the right direction.

Kapler of course defends his team and the GM, sparring with Cataldi over a very interesting and professionally conducted 13 minute interview.

But here’s where my skin bristles and the bile rises in the back of my throat.

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Applying to be the next 97.5 the Fanatic…I’m sorry, I can’t even pretend that’s a good idea

The Fanatic had quite a week. Harry Mayes? LET GO. Eytan Shander? LET GO. Anthony Gargano? DEMOTED. Mike Missanelli? STILL AN ASSHOLE.

By my count, the Fanatic is down to about three on-air hosts, a handful of producers, and countless ad reps desperately trying to re-up their accounts with Anthony’s Coal Fired Pizza before they catch wind of the sinking ship that is the Fanatic.

The station obviously need some new hosts, some new talent to SHAKE UP THE STATUS QUO and tweet out some new and exciting poll questions from the station’s twitter handle for fans to shit all over.

And here’s where I’d normally make a wacky and UTTERLY HILARIOUS fake resume and fake job application to throw my name into the mix for the job. It’s been done. And done againΒ it seems. Just great stuff there. Well played Coggin.

But at this point, is it even realistic anymore to even PRETEND to want to work for the Fanatic? It’s like a curse at this point to work for the station, a horror movie come to life. Everything starts off well, but you know something terrible is going to happen to you before everything is over.

Rumor has it if you say Anthony Gargano’s name three times into a mirror he appears and hands you an iron-clad Fanatic contract and uses your toilet for 45 minutes. I don’t need that evil.

What is the Fanatic doing? Is there any actual personnel strategy to these moves, or is it simply a cost-cutting effort by the sports talk station? Has the hull been breached?

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Angelo Cataldi-Bot 2.0 needs his programming updated

You’d think the 94 WIP programmers in charge of keeping Angelo Cataldi-Bot 2.0 current would have given him a much needed software update after the Eagles won their first Super Bowl against the Patriots this past February.

Hook him up to the computer, download the latest patch to keep him churning for another year, and let’s at LEAST get some new, incorrect takes from this dinosaur.

Here is is assessment from last night’s loss to the Patriots. Bear in mind, this is the preseason. It means absolutely nothing.

Huh….wha? Didn’t the Eagles win a Super Bowl? Are we really turning on this team, this coach, TWO GAMES INTO THE PRESEASON?

Well, ok. Let’s be honest though, Angelo is a professional sports analyst. Maybe he’s seeing something that we’re not? Maybe we should be worried going into this year?

I’m sure Angelo didn’t share the same worries in the 2017 preseason, right? He, of all people, surely saw that Doug Pederson had this team trending in the right direction?

Let’s see what he had to say last year after the jump.

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Angelo Cataldi confirms the Phillies were right to not trade Sixto Sanchez

I can’t imagine the intense amount of relief Philadelphia Phillies GM Matt Klentak must have felt when he saw this headline in the July 23rd issue of Philly Voice:

Cataldi: To win big, Phillies must be willing to risk big β€” and that means dealing prospects

In one rambling, semi-coherent, typo-riddled column, Angelo Cataldi gave his ethereal blessing to the Phillies for not willing to part with prized prospect Sixto Sanchez for the superbly talented, but most certainly a rental player, Manny Machado.

But but but but….he trashed the Phillies for not trading away the farm for two months with Machado! He defiantly stomped his cloven hoof on the ground and ran Klentak through the ringer for not BEING BOLD and GOING FOR IT ALL ON FOURTH AND ONE and what have you.

But then again, this is Angelo Cataldi we’re talking about, so the Phillies should be thrilled.

I’m sure you’ve seen his greatest hits on Twitter by now, but I’ll let Twitter user @JoeyBnB introduce you again to Angelo Cataldi, one of the worst “take-slingers” of all time after the jump.

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Can we all stop falling for Angelo Cataldi’s P.T. Barnum shtick?

“There’s a sucker born every minute, and they’ll all call my radio show if I say something controversial about Carson Wentz and the Eagles.”

angelo

I know, I know. I’ve seen Angelo Cataldi’s tweet about Carson Wentz and Nick Foles this morning too. It’s crazy right? Doesn’t it make you furious that someone could be trumpeting this OUTRAGEOUS line of thinking just a mere month after the Eagles finally won a Super Bowl?! It’s infuriating, and I bet you can’t WAIT to give him a piece of your mind.

But, before you fire up the twitter accounts and lob some well-deserved insults Cataldi’s way, I’d like you to first take aΒ  breath, step away from your keyboard, and give this question some deep, deep thought.

Do you really think he believes this nonsense?

Of course he doesn’t.

Angelo Cataldi is the jowly, tepid Philadelphia sports talk radio version of P.T. Barnum, and he knows how to play this city and its fans like a fiddle to line his own coffers.

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I blame Angelo Cataldi’s Los Angeles trip for Carson Wentz’s knee injury

Last week, either Thursday or Friday, I had the unpleasurable experience of not having the little device that allows you to plug your iPhone 7 into a normal auxiliary cable. You know what I’m talking about, the little connector doohickey that you lose 800 times a week and makes you CURSE THE GODS that Apple has no idea what their consumers want.

Rather than being left alone with my tortured thoughts for 20 minutes, against my better judgement I turned on the WIP morning show (and secretly hoped it would be in the middle of a commercial break so I would come to my senses and turn off the radio) and was BLASTED by Angelo Cataldi’s shrill voice, cackling about his plans for a trip to the west coast to watch the Eagles take on the Rams in a “complete and utter lock” of a game.

Al Morganti temporarily roused himself from his paint-huffing induced stupor and asked Cataldi if he remembered the last time he actually attended an Eagles game in person.

“Not since the Vet,” Cataldi grunted into the microphone.

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I went down the rabbit hole of one WIP listener’s tweets to CBS 3’s Meisha Johnson

Old man Angelo Cataldi continues to have one foot out the door to his retirement and dipped back into his bag of tricks this morning, summoning CBS 3’s weather girl Meisha Johnson to the WIP Morning Show studios to make sure she receives her recommended daily dose of the heebie jeebies and grill her on her love life.

It’s a tired bit and just an excuse for Cataldi to “help” Meisha “put on her headphones,” but my heart always skips a beat and the sky looks even more blue when this pops up on my twitter feed.

There is nothing better in this world than reading the responses from WIP listeners to Meisha Johnson on Twitter.

Nothing.

Better.

Now, usually I’ll go through these tweets and pick out the best ones, but today is different. The very first tweet sent to Meisha is from a listener @gregfrompotomac who “playfully” encourages Meisha to reveal their relationship on air.

Oh ho! I see what you did there, Gregory! Just some “cute” flirting about the “relationship” you have with Meisha. Well done sir! I’m sure the WIP Morning Show gang will get a good laugh out of it.

Hmmm…maybe we should take a quick look at Gregory’s twitter feed, see what else he’s been up to. Probably just a one time tweet to Meisha to be cute, right? Yeah, probably, nobody would make this a habit, right? RIGHT?!

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