Bryce Harper

Did you hear the one about Bryce Harper being traded to Golden State?

Buckle up partner and strap yourself in, because I’m about to tickle your funny bone with an observation SO DROLL and SO HILARIOUS that you’re going to absolutely cream your jeans and have your mind BLOWN after I hit you with it.

Are you ready for this shit? Are you ready to be taken on a mystical tour of hilarity into the ethos of what comedy really means?

You’d better have 911 ready and on call, because you, my friend, are going to bust a gut when you hear this.

Ready? Take a deep breath, hold my hand, and don’t be afraid. I won’t hurt you, I never would.

Bryce Harper, he of the Washington Nationals, a major league baseball team, has been traded to the Golden State Warriors.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA….oh my GOD. How…..how is that even possible?! I’m dying, I’m dying, stop it you’re KILLING ME. He’s, he’s….oh god, but, he’s a BASEBALL PLAYER being traded to a BASKETBALL TEAM.

You see, that’s what makes it so hilarious. Golden State, you see, is stacked with talent and they just signed a superstar after winning yet another NBA championship, so the very idea, the VERY NOTION that Bryce Harper would be traded to the Golden State Warriors is DELIGHTFULLY FARCICAL.

Just a rollicking good time. Nobody else could have POSSIBLY thought of something so out of left field, could they?

Shit….well, okay, I started writing this around 8 a.m. I have the saved draft to prove it. He tweeted it out at 8:26 a.m., so I thought of it first.

Are there any others?

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