Philadelphia, PA – Adding further credence to Chip Kelly’s claims that he and Howie Roseman did not directly speak at all last season, a leaked report has shown the NFL front office originally denied an approved contract between the Eagles and recently released running back DeMarco Murray.
Kelly made claims today that he told a middle man about potential targets he hoped the Eagles would acquire before the 2015 season. Roseman, he said, did all of the contract negotiations.
Miami, FLA – The tortured screams of corner back Byron Maxwell, 28, rang through the Miami Dolphins training center this morning during his required physical to finalize a trade between the Dolphins and Philadelphia Eagles.
Miami Head Athletic trainer Ryan Grove notified the team’s new GM that Maxwell may not be healthy enough to warrant acquiring, as the young athlete could not lift his right arm as high as his shoulder during the physical examination.
Philadelphia, PA – Howie Roseman is at it again, as the man apparently in charge of making personnel moves for the Philadelphia Eagles has announced that running back DeMarco Murray will be traded to the Miami Dolphins, not the Tennessee Titans as was once reported, in a move that will net the Eagles two top-tier defensive players.
When the trade is finalized by the league on Wednesday, the Eagles will officially acquire shut down cornerback Byron Maxwell and stud linebacker Kiko Alonso in the blockbuster deal.
West Long Branch, NJ – The Eagles left the confines of the NovaCare Complex Wednesday night, forced out of Philadelphia by the papal visit, and traveled up the New Jersey Turnpike to practice at Monmouth University on Friday and Saturday.
While at the university, Chip Kelly noted the Eagles would likely give the Monmouth University Hawks a thrill and participate in a few live scrimmages with the Metro Atlantic Athletic Conference squad.
Kelly said the Eagles were concerned about Junior wideout Darren Ambush (Dickerson, MD/Urbana), who recently put up seven receptions for 117 yards, a touchdown and 16 yards rushing against rival Wagner this past Saturday.
At this point in time, Kelly said Eagles corner Byron Maxwell would most likely struggle against Ambush in one on one coverage.
Snickers the possum.
Hey it’s me, Snickers the Possum! If there are two things in this world that I know, it’s that the Johnson’s poodle got what it was coming to it when it was smooshed by a car and I’m an excellent football analyst!
Now, last week I was a little off in my prediction, but who would have thought Byron Maxwell would suddenly forget how to play football and take a metaphysical dump all over the Atlanta field.
I know it’s a bit of a shock, but even Snickers the Possum is wrong once in a while, but this week is a surefire lock for our hometown Philadelphia Eagles who are opening up Lincoln Financial Field against the hated Dallas Cowboys.
Byron, my god, what are you doing?!
Philadelphia, PA – After carefully weighing his options and mulling over the pros and cons, Byron Maxwell, new Eagles corner back, guaranteed the Eagles would appear in the Super Bowl after participating in one OTA.
Maxwell made his statement around 12:15 p.m. this afternoon.
The Coggin Toboggan 