Like Robert Johnson at the crossroads, this blog has a life changing decision to make. Which direction does our blog take? Do we take the deal with the devil, or do we forge another path?
This brings us to the reported trade 76ers GM Bryan Colangelo pulled off over the weekend. Giving the Boston Celtics the #3 pick this year and either the 2018 Lakers 1st round pick or the 2019 Sacramento 1st round pick for the #1 overall pick this year and the rights to draft Markelle Fultz?
I hate this trade. Absolutely despise it.
Not due to the fact that it’s a bad basketball move. It’s a great move for the 76ers, one I didn’t think they’d ever be able to pull off. To draft Fultz, a reported “perfect fit” for the team and not give up a boatload of draft picks or Dario Saric is a win-win.
But if you’ve read this blog since April of 2016 you surely understand our dilemma. I was (and am) firmly in camp Sam Hinkie. Without the Process there’s no way the 76ers even have the opportunity to make this deal. Without his picks, without basically flipping Michael Carter Williams for a lottery pick, you don’t have the bullets to pull this deal off.
For over a year now I’d say about 85% of our content has been firmly rooted in despising Bryan (with a Y) Colangelo and his decrepit father Jerry Colangelo who hired his dunderheaded son (I’m doing it again) to reap the benefits of The Process.
I think Colangelo had to display some HUGE balls to pull this trade off. It’s the right move. It’s a potentially franchise transforming trade that could catapult 76ers fans into a world of carnal delights the likes of which we’ve never experienced before.
But, this brings us back to the crossroads. With this groundbreaking deal, what do we do with Colangelo? Do we stop writing articles about his ineptitude? About only getting the position due to his nepotistic father? His love for gigantic collars?
I loved writing about Colangelo. See here. And here. And here. And here. And here. It goes on…and on…and on.
Do I stop now? Do I eat my words and stop referring to Colangelo as a moron, a dunderhead, a simple child, a blank faced buffoon? It was a great trade, maybe he’s turned a corner and learned from the mistakes of the past?
No.
NO. I’ll never do it, I’ll never be like him. As God as my witness, I’ll never stop believing he’s a complete and utter jackass.
Bask in your praise for the time being, Bryan (with a Y). Live the high life, reap the awards and goodwill of a job well done.
But just remember, we’ll always be there, lurking in the backgrounds, waiting, watching….
When you feel that little prickle in the back of your neck when you’re contemplating overpaying for an aging veteran…when you get uncomfortable chills at night thinking about the future of this franchise…That’s us. Just waiting for you to fuck up.
Just remember we’re watching you. Observing you. Waiting for you to come back to ground zero with a stupid trade, a stupid signing, a stupid media conference.
I have pithy, juvenile headlines about you to last for decades.
You’ll never be safe and you’ll always be the moron you secretly thought you were.