Carson Wentz learning offense quickly, reminds Doug Pederson he hasn’t assigned any homework yet


Brown noser.

Philadelphia, PA – As the Eagles continue their OTA workouts after the holiday weekend, several analysts are lauding rookie quarterback Carson Wentz for his ability to pick up head coach Doug Pederson’s offense quicker than either quarterbacks Sam Bradford or Chase Daniel.

However, Wentz will not be winning any popularity contests with his teammates anytime soon, as the young quarterback is reportedly ruffling the feathers of a number of veterans on the team.

A source within the franchise said several teammates were perturbed that Wentz reminded Pederson that he had not assigned any reading or physical tasks for the holiday weekend after Friday’s practice had come to a close.

“Thank you very much, Carson. I almost forgot. Please, over the weekend I’d like you all to work on your cardio as I’ve seen some of you dogging it out there this week. Also, if  you do not have the first 100 plays in our offensive playbook memorized by Tuesday when we come back, you will be sorry,” Pederson reportedly said.

Wentz reportedly grinned from ear to ear as Pederson lauded him for his honesty, while the rest of the team groaned.

“You can all take a page from Carson’s book. Maybe try to be a little more mature like Carson, and things will work out better,” Pederson said.

Speaking on the condition of anonymity, several sources within the team said Wentz has pointed out the poor conditioning of several veterans to Pederson and the lack of effort in learning the team’s new offense.

“He’s insufferable. During team meetings, whenever Doug (Pederson) 0r (offensive coordinator) Frank (Reich) ask if we have any questions, you just know Wentz’s hand is going to shoot up in the front row and ask a detailed question. He knows the answer, he just wants coach to recognize that he’s paying attention. Everyone just wants these meetings to end so we can go home, but you know Wentz is going to ask a question. God, what a nerd,” a source said.

Several teammates have taken to hazing Wentz during meetings, further alienating the prized rookie from the roster. Bradford has notably taken to throwing spitballs at Wentz whenever Pederson turns his back during meetings, but throws them over his head four out of every five attempts.

At press time, Wentz shrugged off the criticisms and said he’s “hear to learn, not make new friends,” but then looked at a group of laughing teammates going out to lunch together and sighed wistfully.

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