A decrepit Larry Brown hoisted his living corpse from his eternal slumber to call into the 97.5 FM Morning Show and predict a Villanova victory in the NCAA championship match up against UNC.
The SMU coach cackled into his telephone as he provided his analysis of the championship game to host Anthony Gargano.
After running a bony finger through his mealy, stringy hair and shaking the coffin dust off of his head, Brown broke down the UNC/Villanova match-up for tonight.
“Boys and ghouls, thank you for having me on your show and thank you for ‘AXE-ing’ me these questions. It’s your old bosom “bloody” Larry Brown, and the Wildcats will be going “hack” to their roots by playing suffocating defense against the Tarheels of North “Kill”-olina. Hopefully they won’t “choke” away a victory on the grandest stage of them all,” Brown said on the hotline.
When asked how he thought Villanova would respond to the superior athleticism on the UNC side of the ball, Brown said they would have to “hit them where it ‘hearse'” and possibly think about playing a bit of “2-3 ‘groan’ defense” to stifle the Carolina drives to the basket.
“The Wildcats will have to earn their ‘DEAD-agrees’ tonight if they wish to hoist the trophy. All I can say is tonight’s battle will be a real SCREAM. But that is all for Larry Brown, as the sweet call of the grave beckons me into its cold embrace. Until next time, basketball fans, goodbye forever, HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE!” Brown screeched as a coffin slammed shut, cutting off the phone.
Gargano thanked Brown for his time and apologized for interrupting his eternal slumber.