BREAKING NEWS: Doug Pederson tells team Nelson Agholor sent to farm upstate

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He’s living a much happier life now.

Philadelphia, PA – After several repeated inquiries from teammates and coaches prior to tonight’s game against the Green Bay Packers, Eagles Head Coach Doug Pederson is reportedly telling those who ask about Nelson Agholor that the young, troubled wide receiver has been sent to live on a farm  in upstate Pennsylvania.

“We thought Nelson needed some room to run, to play, and to live free on a big lovely farm. Plenty of space for him to prance and live his life away from the prying eyes of the media and disappointed coaches,” Pederson said.

Pederson reportedly handed Agholor’s leash and feeding bowl to Fletcher Cox, telling the defensive lineman that what’s done is done and Nelson would be “much happier where he is now.”

Pederson deflected questions from the roster about where the farm was located, what the name of the farm was, and if they could visit Nelson at a date later on in the year.

“I think he told us that he didn’t really want to see anyone anymore. He’s much, much happier where he is now, where he won’t be under pressure to catch anything or make smart, intelligent comments to the media,” Pederson said.

At press time, Brandon Graham found a bag of Agholor’s personal belongings in a dumpster out behind Lincoln Financial Field.

 

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