Fran Dunphy has been chopping wood since 2 a.m.

fran-dunphyBrooklyn, NY – Several eyewitness reports have confirmed that Temple University Head Coach Fran Dunphy has been chopping wood in Central Park since 2 a.m.

Wielding a sparkling, double-edge axe passed down from his great grand pappy, the silent Dunphy has reportedly chopped down several conifers and a fully grown pine during the six hour marathon session.

His axe rang loud and true at a steady pace for the first three hours, only taking a momentary break around 5:15 a.m. when the 67-year-old coach loosened his tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his crisp, white dress shirt.

As sweat dripped down his furrowed brow, Dunphy silently gave thanks to the heavens with each mighty tree he felled and stood in awe of the majesty of Mother Nature.

At one point around 6 a.m., Dunphy heard a rustling from a nearby clearing and was alerted by a full grown 10-point buck that had its hoof caught in a steel hunters trap. Seeking to ease the magnificent animals pain, Dunphy knelt next to the regal animal, whispered something into its ear that was only heard by him, the buck, and the assembled angels, and then snapped the deer’s neck quickly and painlessly.

He then field dressed the deer and left the venison for a lucky passerby later in the day.

At press time, Dunphy was seen running over the historic Brooklyn bridge back to his hotel room with a cedar log over his shoulder.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s