Tony Romo finally released from dark, cursed bonds, crumbles into dust

romo2212

The tortured soul of Tony Romo, bound to this world by dark forces ungoverned by man, was finally released from his earthly toil this morning.

The Curse of Ankarnarng, which tormented the eons old being that became known as Tony Romo in this most recent millennium, was lifted after NFL insider and ESPN reporter Adam Schefter recited the Incantation of Omor backwards at the 50-yard-line of Cowboys stadium during a full moon.

After the ancient curse was lifted from the agonized, decrepit husk of a body, Romo thanked his liberator for releasing him from his tortured existence, smiled slightly, winked and crumbled into a fine dust, which was picked up by a soft, warm breeze and disappeared into the ether, Schefter reported on his Twitter account.

Making sure to grab the White Sword of Damathria and his iPhone 7 before leaving, Schefter made a hasty retreat prior to the appearance of the fearful ogre known only as “Dak of Prescott.”

At press time, a rage filled, hateful scream from Jerry Jones’s office shook the Cowboys stadium to its very core.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s