Pay no attention to the high-collared dimwit behind the curtain

wizard_behind_the_curtain

YES, JOEL EMBIID WILL HAVE SURGERY ON HIS KNEE. I DO NOT NEED TO GIVE AN EXPLANATION. HE SUFFERED ANOTHER INJURY DURING A PRACTICE IN JANUARY. NO MORE QUESTIONS, THE GREAT GM OF COLANGELO HAS SPOKEN. YOU SHALL COME BACK TOMORROW IF YOU DESIRE MORE DETAILS FOR YOUR PRECIOUS NEWSPAPER COLUMNS AND BLOGS. THE GREAT GM OF COLANGELO HAS DECREED IT SO.

JUST BE HAPPY THAT I GRANTING YOU AN AUDIENCE TOMORROW AND NOT TWENTY YEARS FROM NOW YOU SIMPERING MEMBERS OF THE MEDIA, I HAVE SPOKEN. HOW DARE YOU SECOND GUESS THE GREAT, AND ALL POWERFUL, GM OF COLANGELO.

::A blogger from Liberty Ballers sees a curtain to the side of the press room and pulls it open, revealing Bryan Colangelo pulling several levers and speaking menacingly into a microphone::

UntitledIG….IGNORE THE DIMWITTED, HIGH-COLLARED MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN! I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL GM OF COLANGELO. YOU UNGRATEFUL CREATURES, THE GREAT GM OF COLANGELO HAS SPOKEN, PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT DIMWIT BEHIND THE CURTAIN.

I….I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL GM…THE GM….urrr….yeah. It’s true. I’m no great and powerful GM. Just a dimwit placed in power by my father. I didn’t want this, I didn’t want this pressure in my life.

I accepted the title of GM when it was made very clear I had no other choice. I am but a simple dimwit, a charlatan, I apologize to you all.

I’m…I’m a very good man, just not a very good GM. I know I promised you all so much, championships, titles, free agent signings….I wish I could confer upon you all these rewards, these great deeds, but I cannot. I haven’t the courage, or the brains, or the necessary heart to do so.

Back where I come from, we have men that are called GMs. I am not one of these men.

 

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