Chris, may I call you Chris? Mr. Thompson, is that better? Can we settle on Chris? Chrissy? C-Thompson? Cris? Ok, Chris it is. Good, glad we got that settled.
I’d like to take a moment to address your unfounded claims that you won’t let your family attend this Monday’s game against the Eagles because you’re worried for their safety. You shared your fears with the Washington Post, explaining that Philadelphia fans were “the meanest” in football and you just didn’t feel comfortable having them in attendance.
Well, Chris, I’d like to assuage your fears. Nothing could be farther from the truth! Your family will be absolutely fine if they come to Philadelphia. Do you know why?
It’s because you’re just not worth it.