The Flyers are gone, and we couldn’t do nothing about it

At the end of Goodfellas when Tommy thinks he’s going to a meeting to become a made man, two members of the family he’s involved with bring him to an empty rumpus room and put a bullet in his head, essentially wiping their hands of a once-promising, but now disappointing and dangerous man who took too many chances and never saw his demise coming.

But really, if he had stopped to think about it for more than few minutes he would have realized what he was walking into. Sure, he was a good earner, but he killed Billy Batts, a made man, in a fit of rage and thought he could get away with it. He killed Spider, he killed Stacks, he killed Morrie and his horrible wig, so the idea that he thought he was going to become a made man didn’t make a ton of sense.

But they lured him in with big promises and he couldn’t see past what could have been. He ended up dead on a dirty linoleum floor, in a puddle of his own blood, next to an empty card table.

Yesterday, as we watched the Flyers claw their way to a 4-2 in the third period against the hated Penguins, we thought we were on the road to being made men.

They were giving the Penguins all they could handle! All they had to do was hold on to a two goal lead, force a game 7, and shock the hockey world and the city! They were going to be made men, and by proxy, so were the fans.

Then, well, Radko Gudas decided to stick handle his way past 800 Penguins in his own end, turned the puck over for an easy goal to make it 4-3, and suddenly the Penguins were leading all of us into a rumpus room with a concealed pistol in their pocket.

Some of us even fell harder for it than others.

I’d wager about 10 minutes after this tweet the Penguins were leading 5-4 and would NEVER look back, putting the Flyers out of their misery with an 8-5 drubbing.

Akin to digging up a decomposed Billy Batts, I had to grab my shovel and pull up a rotting, stinking corpse to avoid being crushed further.

Well here we are again, Flyers. The fans have seen this before. Shaky coaching, shaky goaltending, shaky defense couldn’t make up for the heroics of a few determined members of the roster and the Flyers are out again.

Is this the year, though, that the fans have had enough? Do we hand them that final $3,200 and then turn our backs on them?

It’s pathetic, and no we won’t because we suck and the Flyers are two years away, right? Well let me tell you something….the Flyers are ALWAYS TWO YEARS AWAY. AIN’T THAT A GODDAMN GEOGRAPHICAL ODDITY, ALWAYS TWO YEARS AWAY FROM RELEVANCE.

It’s the line every hardcore fan vomits out of his or her mouth every preseason. “Well, they’ll be okay this year, maybe make the playoffs, BUT IN TWO YEARS WATCH OUT!”

Sure, they may have some young studs coming up, but will Dave Hakstol actually let them play? By the time he “trusts them” then old guard of Giroux, Voracek, Simmonds will be gone and we’ll be back to square one.

They’ll be two years away until the end of time.

Just walk me into the rumpus room, tell me I’m going to be made, and then put a bullet in my head.

At least than I won’t have to flip on the Flyers, go into witness protection, and eat egg noodles and ketchup for the rest of my life like a schnook.

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