Two games in, just two games in to Markelle Fultz’s professional basketball career (if you can call the NBA Summer League a “Professional League.” Anyone who isn’t a rookie playing in these games will be exiled back to their home countries in shipping containers and never heard from again…or Dante Exum, for some reason) and Twitter already has some STRONG opinions on his play.

Nevermind that he’s played less than a games worth of minutes so far in his career. We’re coming off the Fourth of July, so it’s our AMERICAN RIGHT to declare Fultz a savior of Philadelphia or a complete bust already. I wouldn’t have it any other way. You think they’re doing this up in Canada? I don’t think so….USA USA USA USA USA ::Hacksaw Jim Duggan thumbs up::

But, for fun, let’s analyze some tweets from fans and “professional analysts” who already have some STRONG opinions on Fultz’s game.

You shut your god damned mouth, Harley. I don’t need a level-headed assessment of Fultz from a Celtics fan. You take your well thought out evaluation of his performance and shit it out all over Yawkey Way or Big Papi Boulevard, whatever the fuck it’s called now.

You know what else is accurate? Anyone who spells the name Mark with a “C” and has an apostrophe in his last name should fall down a flight of stairs.

Always a fan favorite….an old white guy lecturing a young black athlete on tattoo selection. Give em’ hell, Keith! I’m sure he’ll regret all of his tattoos in 15 years, because comparing a grown man’s actions to the whims of your children is an appropriate lesson.

Couldn’t agree more, Bedong. Rough translation: “Markelle Fultz will surely have as much success in the NBA as the Coggin Toboggan has on the Philadelphia blog scene.”

Thank you, Michael, we were all wondering when a rejected “Sons of Anarchy” rival biker gang extra was going to chime in on his performance.

I do agree that he has the potential to be a superstar. Awoooooooooooooo! Sweet twitter avatar picture. Just a renegade with nothing to lose, a wolf without a pack who enjoys NBA basketball. Anyone who refers to themselves as a “lone wolf” is either morbidly obese, a genuine psychopath, or an excessive sweater. #markmywords

What? ::hits translate button:: “markelle fultz on: cp3 flavour but offensive potential will rise a little higher like cp3ten does not coach bastard may be a myth/beautiful Wed”

Couldn’t have said it better myself. That god damn coach bastard may be a myth or a beautiful Wednesday. Really make you think.

What an asshole.