Disappointed Ryan Howard definitely expected a car

iPhiladelphia, PA – Ryan Howard, the last member of the 2008 World Series roster, bade farewell to the fans and the organization yesterday in what was his last game in a Phillies uniform.

The Phillies honored their beloved slugger prior to the start of yesterday’s game, allowing a tearful Howard to address the crowd.

“It’s amazing, the appreciation from the organization and the fans,” Howard said. “To have it recognized, it’ll live with me forever.”

Howard dabbed tears away from his eyes, but looked upbeat as he once again took to the microphone and looked towards the outfield wall.

“But you know what helps heal the pain? Taking a nice drive. Let’s drive it out here boys, come on, let’s go!” Howard said, clapping as he excitedly turned his attention to where the Phanatic drives his ATV out onto the field.

The 36,000 in attendance gasped and excited focused their attention to the outfield at Howard’s behest…but after several awkward moments it was quite clear that nothing was being driven out to the infield for Howard.

“Oh….well ok. It’s been a great run, I guess. Whatever. Let’s get this over with,” he said, before dropping his mic onto home plate.

At press time, a harried and sweaty Matt Klentak ran out onto the field before Howard reached the dugout and handed him a Freddy Galvis signed bat and a coupon for “1 free back rub.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s