Autograph seekers criticize professional athlete who is 30 years younger for immaturity

05012016-wentz-airportPhiladelphia, PA – The two autograph seekers who booed Carson Wentz after the draftee denied them an autograph as he was being hustled through the Philadelphia Airport criticized Wentz for his “lack of class” and “immaturity” that the two middle-aged men clearly possess.

Wishing to remain anonymous, the first pasty autograph seeker (who by all accounts is well into the middle of his life, but has enough free time in his life to drop everything to stalk an athlete in the Philadelphia airport) said Wentz “really needs to grow a thicker skin” if he’s going to make it in Philadelphia.

“It’s my right as a Philadelphia Eagles fan to boo. I don’t care, did you see that?! He didn’t stop everything he was doing and sign the blank piece of paper I had shoved in his face. The nerve of that guy, he really needs to work on his maturity to succeed, I can tell you that,” the autograph seeker told reporters, who crinkled their noses at the combination of body odor and Miller High Life emanating from the fan.

The second autograph seeker, wearing a sweat stained Eagles hat, nodded along in agreement and noted that professional athletes “in this town should be on call for us 24-hours a day. They owe us that much. If I ask for an autograph, I want one now. Now now now!”

“We’re going to boo you, Carson, we’re going to boo you! I put on my best pair of sweat pants for this day and you’re ruining it for me! You’re ruining it for all of us!” he screamed, trying to hold back tears as he recounted the event.

At press time, Wentz noted that he didn’t have time to sign any autographs during his walk through the airport and apologized, but would definitely have time to sign autograph for the “two five-year-old girls” the next time he sees them.

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