Denver, Colo. – Peyton Manning, arguably the one of the greatest quarterbacks to ever play the game, held an emotional press conference today to announce that a new variety of Papa John’s Pizza would be available at locations countrywide.
In front of hundreds of assembled media members, former players, coaches, and front office executive, Manning officially confirmed what many had reported on since early Sunday morning.
“Yes, it is true. I’m here today to tell you that Papa John’s will be selling it’s new Bacon Bonanza pizza nationwide. This baby is loaded. Over three pounds of bacon used per pizza makes it the most bacon heavy pizza ever sold,” Manning told the assembled group.
“I’ve never been prouder to make this announcement.”
Manning held up a piece of the new pizza and gave a warm nod to John Schnatter, the founder of Papa John’s Pizza, who was sitting in the front row of the conference.
“This pizza has got it all. Great crust, our famous sauce…because as we always say, better ingredients, better pizza,” Manning said, smiling as he took a bite of the heaping slice.
At one point in the announcement, a visibly emotional Manning choked up when he said the new pizza would be available for just $6.99 through online ordering.
“It’s just overwhelming to have been a part of this deal. I promised myself I was going to hold it together up here today,” he said, dabbing tears away from his eyes.
At press time, Manning announced he would also be retiring from the game of football, but would have the “distinct pleasure” of continuing to shill mediocre pizza for “many, many years to come.”