Philadelphia, PA – Thousands of wives throughout the Delaware Valley shook their heads in disbelief around 5 p.m. Sunday night as their husbands were still depressed an hour after the Eagles lost a heartbreaking game to the Miami Dolphins.
“Oh come on, it’s not that big of a deal. It’s just a game, are you really depressed about this?” the wives said, chuckling to themselves as they got up from the couches to leave their infuriated husbands alone to continue watching television. “You don’t see me getting upset about this stuff.”
Husbands everywhere struggled to contain their emotions, showing more anger and depression than they had in months over anything else.
“Really? This is what you take seriously in life? It’s just a game!” the wives said, busying themselves as their silent husbands continued to watch Red Zone, silently stewing as they ran the game over and over through their heads.
“You still have your health, and a nice home, and a great family. You’re really going to be annoyed at this for the rest of the day? Jesus christ,” the level-headed wives said, 100% correct.
At press time, the atmospheres in thousands of homes became downright frosty as the husbands collective fantasy teams started to lose by larger and larger margins.