Washington, DC – Speaking to the media yesterday for the first time since suffering an undisclosed injury against the Detroit Lions last week, RGIII emphatically declared he did not suffer a concussion after being hit several times and kindly asked reporters to turn off whatever machine was making that high pitching buzzing noise.

“Look, my brain is fine, it really is. Did it just get really dark in here? Man, someone turn on a light,” He said, his pupils fully dilated despite being in a well lit, bright room.

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