RIP Mr. Kruger: There will be no feats of strength where you’re going

Daniel Von Bargen, wondering why George would ever try and give him a fake Christmas gift.

Daniel Von Bargen, wondering why George would ever try and give him a fake Christmas gift.

When The Coggin Toboggan wants to get serious it turns its coverage over to its editor and founder to bring everything to a screeching halt. Goodbye funny, say hello to self pity and depression.

In depressing news not related to anything that has to do with Philadelphia sports, Daniel Von Bargen, the actor who portrayed the gloriously hilarious Mr. Kruger on four episodes of Seinfeld, died today.

My only question is, what will happen with Kruger Industrial Smoothing now? They really botched that Statue of Liberty job (they couldn’t get the green stuff off) and took it on the chin last year, so what will happen now that their founder and CEO has passed away?

Oh well. We shall miss you, Mr. Kruger. Hopefully when you get to Heaven the “K” on the gates will have not fallen off and sound like one of those old timey car horns (K-uggggger! K-ugggger!)

Obviously God figured he could go either way on you….but they needed somebody so what the hell.

Here’s to hoping that you don’t find any pear shaped losers up there and feel the need to throw all of their stuff into the ocean.

Here’s to hoping you can spin around in your chair more than 5 times with no hands.

Here’s to hoping that nobody will give you anymore fake Christmas gifts.

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